[
    "What did the Romans say after they caught the heretic? Nailed it.",
    "How many heretics does it take to change a lightbulb? We're not sure, they've yet to see the light.",
    "What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile",
    "What's faster than a cheetah? A Jew with a coupon!",
    "What is the difference between acne and a Catholic priest? Ance usually comes on a boy's face after he turns 12.",
    "What's the best part about being a Rabbi? You get to keep the tips.",
    "We are all God's childern right? And Jesus is God's only son, right? So aren't we all women?",
    "If con is the opposite of pro, then isn't Congress the opposite of progress?",
    "How did we know know communism was doomed from the beginning? All the red flags.",
    "Why do Communists drink herbal tea? Because proper tea is theft.",
    "Did you hear about the dyslexis devil worshipper? He sold his soul to Santa",
    "Diabetic? More like sugar retarded",
    "Alan, the original heretic"
]